What are you waiting for?

This past weekend, our family had the opportunity to attend an Army Strong Bonds retreat. This wasn't our first time going, but it was definitely our favorite of all of them. If you've never been to one, then please read on and let me tell you about them.

The Army Strong Bonds program is designed to help military families remain strong and resilient in the face of deployments and pressures that we have faced over the last decade. They are usually held at a resort type hotel. And while they are run by the Army's Chaplains Corps, it really doesn't have any kind of religious flavor to it. Families are encouraged to bring their children and child care is always offered. Typically, you arrive on a Friday evening for a 2 hour session with your spouse. For every retreat we've been on, the child care has a separate room with plenty of workers; you check your kids in and then go to your class. Depending on the size of the retreat, there can be anywhere from 20 to 40 families. Most of your meals for the weekend are covered. There is always free time and usually there is child care offered during part of that free time so that you can spend some time alone with your spouse.

For our trip this past weekend, we were at the Great Wolf Lodge in Grapevine, TX (adjacent to the Dallas/Fort Worth airport). To me, it is the perfect setting. I mean, who doesn't want to spend a weekend at a hotel with a giant indoor water park and have nearly all of your expenses covered??? We had plenty of time over the weekend to play in the park along with the sessions that we attended. The meals were great and we had absolutely no complaints.

Usually, the sessions that you attend are focused on ways to strengthen your family. And while there are several different curriculums that are taught, the one we had was called 7 Habits of Highly Effective Military Families. Activities throughout the session are designed to show you ways of dealing with the ups and downs of being a military family. Of all of the curriculums that we've used over the years, this was definitely the best. It was very practical and extremely useful.

Here's the thing: there are tons of stressors on our military families these days. We're being told that deployments are going to slow down, but with our changing world, there's no real guarantee that will happen. Add to that the long hours that our soldiers work and the stress that they are under each day, and you can imagine the strain that our families can come under.

The Army finally began to realize what was happening to our families 7 or 8 years ago. It began to realize that in order to have an effective, stable fighting force it needed to have strong, stable families behind those soldiers. Soldiers don't reenlist and stay in if their families aren't happy. Strong Bonds is part of that effort. There have been some tough times during the deployments we've faced over the last 4-5 years. But I've never felt like the Army didn't care about us during those times. Sure, there was a time when the mentality of "the Army didn't issue you a wife and children" held sway. Those days, however, are gone. The truth is, our senior leadership actually does care about the overall health of our military families.

The Army isn't alone in this effort. The Navy and Marines have what's called CREDO, and the Air Force, while not having an over arching service wide program, provides services and retreats put on by individual bases that are very similar in nature to Strong Bonds. With all of these resources being offered to our military families, there's no reason why any military family shouldn't take advantage of one of these retreats. So here's the question: what are you waiting for?



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The challenge of the military spouse

If there's one thing that's certain about life as a military spouse, it's the fact that nothing is for certain. Think about it: those of you who are military spouses...how many times before have your active duty spouses come home and told you that your family was moving to a given location only to have that change? Has there ever been a time when something on the calendar that had been there for months was discarded at the last moment due to the "chain of command"? Ever been told he/she was going to be home for a while only to deploy a few weeks later? As military spouses, we are adaptable by nature simply because we have to be. Nothing is ever really set in stone when it comes to our lives. We learn to roll with the punches and keep moving forward.

This is especially true when it comes to getting involved in a new place after we've moved. Military spouses are faced with the challenge of finding a place to belong, if only for a short period of time. We make friends with other military spouses quite easily because we have a common frame of reference. But what about the people in a given area who are permanent? The truth is finding close friends becomes a lot harder. We have to ask ourselves if we want to allow our emotions to take us from having several acquaintances to calling several people friends. We ask because we know, in the end, we'll be leaving. We are only here for a short period of time. In essence, we're temporary.

This doesn't just pertain to us. People have to decide whether or not they want to invest in us. They know, just as we do, that the time is coming soon when we won't be here any more. Sure, they'll get to know you. But, more times than not, they simply choose not to go too deeply with you because of the possibility of pain that is attached to a goodbye. It is easier to keep a relationship superficial and hold us at arms length rather than to get too close and experience loss.

Living in San Angelo, I know that my time here will come to a definite end at some point in the very near future. Keeping that in mind, I have to ask my self if really going deep with someone in a friendship is worth the pain of loss involved when we move again. I've been privileged to get to know so many people who weren't associated with the military in the 14 years I've been a military spouse. That said, the number of those people that I've met that I would consider deep personal friends is tiny. Finding someone who is willing to risk hurt along with you is, frankly, exceedingly rare.

If there's one thing that I've learned over these past 14 years it's that folks in any given location are happy to get to know you but will nearly always invest in someone who isn't going away in a few years instead of us. Sometimes it comes as a disappointment, other times it comes as no surprise. It's probably the number one reason that military spouses list other military spouses as their closest friends. As I said above, we have a common frame of reference. We understand the each other. We already have so much in common that developing real friendships comes naturally. We rely on each other to get through.

I remember when my wife was deployed to Afghanistan and I lived in Savannah with my folks. I was the only military spouse within miles of where we lived. There was no one around who had a clue what it was like to go through a year long deployment, one where your soldier spouse is in a combat zone and in real danger each and ever day. For 10 months I dealt with the fears and worries of that deployment alone, with no one who could relate. Then, with 2 months to go, we moved back to Fort Bragg into a house on post. I found myself surrounded by no less than 4 spouses who were going through EXACTLY the same thing. We immediately bonded, and even though we've all moved on to other duty stations, I still look at them as not just people I know, but as friends for life.

Each time we move we once again face the challenge of meeting new people and trying to get involved. Sometimes we succeed and sometimes we give up and just bide our time until the next PCS comes around. We live a bit of a nomadic existence, and yet, it's a life that few of us would trade. Given the chance to do it over again, I wouldn't trade any of it. I bought into this life when we got married and I'm here to stay. Yes, we face challenges wherever we go in terms of finding a "home". Truthfully, I've yet to find a place where I could say "yep, this is HOME." That said, my life is richer from the process. I think of all I would have missed if I'd never made this my life. Sure, there are challenges. But the rewards are always better.

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And still we move forward

14 years ago, I tied the knot with a young lieutenant while she was stationed in Savannah, GA where I was living. At the time, all I could think of was marrying the girl of my dreams. Never did it occur to me that I'd be joining the Army family. And yet, 14 years later, here we are.

There have been lots of ups and downs over the years. 3 long deployments nearly knocked the wind out of my sails on a couple of occasions, and yet we kept on going. 4 children have added much joy to our lives, along with their share of trouble (!), and yet we've kept on going. 8 PCS moves in 14 years have created their own share of challenges and difficulties (along with a LONG list of items that have gotten broken along the way). And yet, through it all, we keep on going.

The years of this Army life have taught me so much about resiliency, about "soldiering on", about being there for those who are also dealing with deployments. I remember when my wife deployed to Afghanistan back in 2009. It was our first deployment with kids. I packed up our house and the kids and I moved to Savannah to hang with my folks for the year. I believed then that I needed the help, that I couldn't do this on my own. During that year, I learned that wasn't actually true. It turns out that I not only survived the deployment, I grew and changed for the better. So much so that when the next deployment hit us 9 months later, I didn't even consider moving back to Savannah again. I knew I was capable of handling everything by myself.

It's nice to look back over the years at what we've accomplished and what we've made it through. However, I generally only do that for very brief moments. I can't change what happened before, and, to tell the truth, I wouldn't change it if I could. No, I'm constantly looking forward, constantly moving forward. After all, my kids don't care about what my strategies for surviving a deployment were. They're more interested in what we're having for dinner, what we're doing this weekend, and, to a small extent, where we might end up with the next PCS move.

Sure, there've been some really unpleasant moments in dealing with this Army life. But, as with anything, you take the good with the bad and you keep moving forward. So... here's to the next decade (or more!) of Army life. Whatever it brings, we'll face it together and make the most of it.
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It's Just What We Do

Recently I was part of a featured article on a (now) well known husband of a woman who'd had a very unfortunate turn of events in her life. The article was about how he stuck by her side during the crisis she was going through. Half way through the article, the author mentioned me and my situation as being similar (although without the crisis part). He talked about how I was a supportive husband to an Army officer with a successful career.

While it was nice to hear someone saying kind things about how I've done my best to support my wife in her career, I was struck by a few thoughts that I thought perhaps he hadn't considered. I'd like to share them with you.

I think that a lot of people perhaps have the idea that we, as male military spouses, have given up more than others in supporting our soldier spouses. Having been a military spouse for close to 14 years now and having met so many different spouses over the years I can tell you that this isn't true. As spouses, we all have sacrificed much in support of our soldiers, sailors, and airmen. Whether or not we are male or female makes no difference. What it boils down to is this: we love our spouses and we will do whatever it takes to support them.

While it's true that many in the civilian community don't understand the challenges that we face, if our roles were reversed I don't think they'd be any less supportive than we are. Yes, we understand that we are also serving our country when we give up our careers and move all over the country so that our spouses can answer our nation's call. But I believe it's more than that. We act out of more than just service and willingness to sacrifice. We act out of love.

The truth is, we do what we do because we love our spouses. Yes, they are in the military, and yes, that does pose stresses and problems that most wouldn't ever have to face. But it doesn't change our commitment to our loved one. When I married my wife, I had no idea about what was ahead. I've been told many times that I "knew what I was getting into" when my wife was leaving on yet another deployment. Sorry, but no, I didn't. No spouses does. HOWEVER, that does not change my support and love for my wife. And, I might add, had I known what was ahead, I still would have made the same choice. When you love someone like I love my wife (and most likely, like you love your spouse) you don't pick and choose the circumstances in which you'll maintain your support. Whatever the cost, whatever life brings our way, my love and support of my wife will never change. "For better or for worse" aren't just familiar terms used in a marriage vow. They are a promise that was made and the outward expression of a depthless love towards my wife.

Here's the thing: I'm not alone in this. I'm putting this all in writing here on my blog, but I'm far from the only one who feels this way. As military spouses, we set aside everything because we love our service member. It's just what we do. And it won't ever change.

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It's not just Army wives any more!

Throughout the years, I've wondered what it would be like to get up and go to a job each and every day. Oh sure, I've had a regular job. I was a school teacher, 12 and a half years ago, that is. Since then, aside from a few odds and ends jobs never totally more than a couple of hours per week, I haven't worked a regular, proper paying job since. That's right. I'm a stay at home dad.

For most guys, this isn't something that comes naturally. We have this innate drive in us to provide for our families, to be the one with the hard driving career that defines us. So, to give it all up and accept a 7 day/week job that doesn't pay a penny but has LONG hours can be a tough swallow for many men. Yes, I know... there are plenty of ladies who have been doing this for years and don't want to hear our complaints. Honestly, I'm not complaining, I'm just giving you, my gentle reader, a glimpse into the mind of a guy (scary place that it might be!).

What is more revealing, though, is the fact that in our military, there are more and more women who are stepping up to serve. And many of their spouses are leaving behind careers to support their wives as they serve. What used to be uncommon has become less so. Attending an FRG meeting and seeing dudes there who aren't in uniform isn't so surprising any more. Take my wife's unit, for example. There are currently 5 of us. And all of us are active in the unit, not just hiding out, hoping not to be seen. And the more that come and get involved, the easier it is for more to feel comfortable doing it as well.

There are those, however, who simply can't get away from the stereotypes that have defined military spouses for generations. I'll give you two examples, both of which come from the LTC/SGM Pre-Command Course that I attended with my wife. This course was intended to prepare spouses for the roles that we would play as either the Commander or SGM spouse in our units.

The first example was the welcome letter I received three weeks prior to the arriving at the course. It was the standard letter welcoming me and assuring me that this course would be beneficial to my experience as a commander's spouse. That was all well and good except for who they made the letter out to. That's right, it started off by saying, "Dear Mrs. Blake." All I could do was shake my head when

I saw it. Think about it: they had all of my information prior to the course. I was registered as Tim Blake (as my name tag I received upon arrival would attest) and was expected. And yet, whoever was in charge of the event made the same old generalization and assumed that, as a spouse, I must indeed be a female.

The second example was even more grievous than the first. On the first day of the course, we were separated from our active duty spouses and taken to a large conference room for panel discussions with "senior spouses". The first included the CG's wife, and the second included two spouses (both wives) of the Army's most senior leadership. The CG's wife continually told us about how we could best support our "husbands". One of the other wives addressed our group by saying "well, good morning ladies!" What made this completely inexcusable in BOTH cases was that there were no less than 5 of us guys in the room, ALL OF US SITTING IN THE FRONT ROW. At the end of the second session with the two "senior wives", the afore mentioned spouse uttered this: "Thank you so much ladies!" As you can imagine, I'd had enough. I stood up and said, "and gentlemen!" She fell all over herself apologizing for her mistake, but the damage had been done.

You see, this is exactly why more men don't get involved in spouses groups and the like. And this will continue as long as this current generation of military spouses clings to these same generalizations and stereotype. The thing is, soldiers aren't just men any more, and it's not just military wives who are military spouses any more either. It is up to us to start changing the culture and making spouses of BOTH sexes feel welcomed and included.

The challenge used to be the officer spouses against the enlisted spouses (and maybe in some places it still is, but it hasn't been in any of the places I've been in the last 6 years). Now, the challenge is realizing that more and more men are military spouses. I don't consider myself an "Army Husband". I'm an Army Spouse. And so are all of us who are married to members of the military. It's not just Army Wives any more!

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Not what I expected

Yes, I know, it's been quite a while since I last posted a blog. While life here has been busy, that's not the whole reason. To tell you the truth, I've been a bit conflicted on how to put what I was feeling into words for this post. As you, my loyal reader, are aware, there was MUCH trepidation about moving here to San Angelo. What would life look like here? Moving from a large Army post to a small Air Force base in a small town seemed a bit daunting to me. Now that I've been here for nearly two months, I think I can sum up my feelings for San Angelo in one word: SURPRISE!

I think it is easy to come up with preconceptions in your mind based on what you think you're getting into. Then, you realize how way off those preconceptions were. San Angelo, to me, is just that: a preconception of mine that turns out to be way off!

San Angelo has a small town feel, but is actually mid sized, nearly 100,000 in population. The pace here is slower than what I used to, and the people are more friendly than I've ever experienced. And, I have to say, the city's planners truly got this place right. The are more and wider roads than are needed. Meaning? Traffic is NEVER congested.

In terms of quality of life, this city has it all. Many of the larger chain restaurants are here, but the real jewels are the local places. Yes, it's true the water here is BAD (nearly undrinkable), but more than half of the places use RO water filters, so all is well. The city has a great park system and money is being spent to upgrade what is already here. Even the heat (which, granted, is pretty ridiculous) is manageable. Thanks to the super dry air we have here, 100+ degrees isn't that bad. For instance, in my last blog I wrote about the challenges of training for a marathon in this heat. Well, in the month since, I've switched my running times to the evenings when the air is the most dry. Last weekend I ran 10 miles. the starting temp for that run? 102. Because there's a breeze and the air is so dry, it really isn't that bad.

The residents of San Angelo are also fiercely pro military. Every where we go when my wife is in uniform, someone thanks us for our service. Soldiers tell us often of their meals being paid for by strangers. It's nice to live in a place where folks appreciate what you sacrifice for their freedoms.

As far as our family goes, things couldn't have turned out more different than what I imagined. We found a truly amazing church the week we got here. Two weeks after we arrived, I was offered a job teaching martial arts to kids of military families. This will, in fact, be the first real paying job I've had in nearly 10 years. Since it will be after school hours and my kids will be in it as well, it won't interfere with my responsibilities as a  dad.

I think the point is this: often when we PCS we have these pre(mis)conceptions about the places we're going. We've gotten comfortable where we've been and don't want to move. We never expect the place we're going to be as good as where we've been (unless you're one of the lucky ones who gets to PCS to Hawaii, but I digress...). A PCS move is nearly always a leap into the unknown. We leave behind friends that we've made, believing that we won't be able to make good friends in our new location. What we find is that is almost NEVER true. Sure, there have been exceptions, places we move to that never really do fit. But those, in my experience, are rare.

PCS moves are full of challenges. But they are also full of opportunities. Our move here has taught me that. What I thought was going to be a long two years away from civilization in a place that is hotter than Hades, has in fact turned out to be totally different (ok, it is hotter than Hades...). San Angelo has completely surprised me. In fact, I'd be willing to call it one of the best kept secrets in the military. I'm glad to be here!

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A marathoner in San Angelo

We've been in San Angelo for almost a month now. My wife has taken command of a battalion and is loving it. And while the days are long and she's been getting home late, we're making it work. The kids don't really have a bed time, since it's Summer, so they're up for a while after she gets home.

On the work front, I scored a job teaching martial arts to kids and have had preliminary discussions to start a class for adults. This will be my first paying job in 10 years. The classes for kids start in the Fall, so until then, my kids and I have been training on our own. All in all, life is going quite well in nearly every area except one.

As you can imagine, living in west Texas means the days are HOT. This has NOT been beneficial on my running and training for my next marathon. In fact, I'd say I've taken a few steps backwards in terms of my fitness. While the heat here is indeed a dry heat, when it's up around 100, running becomes impossible. Now, I know there are some of you skinny folk who scoff at my weakness. I would answer by asking you to go out in the heat and try to train for a marathon at 250 lbs.

Thus far, the only way I've managed to get any miles in at all has been to get up early and head out around sunrise when the temps are in the mid to upper 70s. Even then, running for more than an hour becomes a trial. That's because by 8 am the temps have already begun rising into the 80s. Yep, it gets hot early here.

There's also the fact that while the early morning hours are cooler, they are more humid. The dew points (a measure of the amount of moisture in the air) are typically in the mid to upper 60s (fairly humid; places like the deep south have dew points in the lower to mid 70s) in the morning. By late afternoon, those dew points have usually dropped into the mid to upper 50s, meaning really dry air. That said, the temps during that time are at their highest. So... I can go out and run in humid, cool air, or dry, hot air. The choices aren't inspiring.

In terms of marathon training, I imagine I can get my mid week runs in since they generally only last for 45 minutes to an hour. It's the long runs that concern me. How in the world do you go out and get a 10-15 mile run in (much less 20 miles!) when the temps rise so quickly. It's definitely a pickle!

I guess the only solution will be to get up even earlier. Can you imagine getting up at 4 am to go out and run for 3 hours? Me neither. But that might be the only way to do this. The thing is, though, I'm a committed marathoner. I actually look forward to the long runs as a way to decompress from the long week and have some time to myself. So, as the summer drags on and the runs get longer, I'll be getting up earlier. For those of you in San Angelo, don't worry; I'll be really quiet as I run by your house!

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Onward

The day that I dreaded (initially) has finally come and gone. As I type this blog, we're somewhere deep in Mississippi on our way to Texas. It's still hard to believe all of the changes that led to this point. I won't recount them now as I've pretty much said all there is to say about it in previous blogs. Suffice to say, we're no longer residents of Fort Bragg, NC. Due to a scheduling mess up with our household goods, however, we won't be in our future home until mid-late June. So, you guessed it. We're of officially homeless!

As I sit here typing away, I can't help but think about how this move is affecting my family. My wife, of course, is super excited to be moving to Texas. A battalion command is pretty much the pinacle of an Army officer's career. This is a huge opportunity to her and it is something that she has dreamed of. For me, I'm also looking at this as an opportunity. As a young captain's husband all those years ago, I was treated pretty unfairly by our battalion commander's wife. I want to make sure that something like that doesn't happen in our battalion. Further, I'm hoping to simply be a help/support/mentor to younger spouses who may be new to the Army life.

My kids have had a mixed reaction to the move. My youngest is really just along for the ride. Being 5 means you just want to have a good time wherever you are. My daughter left behind a little girl with whom she'd become inseparable over the last two years. It's been a bit tough for her to leave her friend behind. That said, she's doing fine with this and is looking at this as an adventure. My second oldest has not yet, to this point, gotten in touch with his feelings. He also had a best friend back at Fort Bragg. However, they said goodbye to each other, did a handshake, and that was that.

For my oldest, though, this has been quite hard. Fort Bragg was the first place that he ever developed an close friendship to another person. He had two other guys that formed this little group. They are very close and are the best of friends. When he got off the bus on Friday the tears were flowing. It was heart wrenching to watch my son sobbing. Understand, this is not a kid who cries often. He's a very mature 10 year old. Not long after the bus had pulled away, one of the other two kids rode over our house with his mom just to say goodbye. As both boys hugged, they both were in tears.

Watching this transpire brought on an unwelcome realization: this is the first of many more difficult farewells to come. Now that my kids are getting older, they are going to start finding it harder and harder to say goodbye to close friends. And while this is something that you hate to see happen, it is, unfortunately, a part of the Army life. In our travels with the Army over the last 13 and a half years of marriage, there have been truly amazing people that have come into my life. I've made great and lifelong friends nearly everywhere we've been. And, without fail, I've had to tell them all goodbye. Oh sure, there's Facebook, Skype, Twitter. There's no finality to goodbye any more if you really want to stay in touch. That said, these are people who I no longer have the privilege of their company. And while it's nice to stay in touch, a computer screen is no substitute for face to face.

And so my children are now learning that with farewell comes pain, sorrow, and the sense of loss. They are beginning to understand what heartache actually feels like. And they are learning that sometimes it's OK to cry.

BUT... they are also GOING to learn that with each new assignment, each new city comes the joy of meeting new people. They'll learn that while some people exit our lives, new people come in to take their places. So, as the picture above says... just hold on and wait for tomorrow. It's gonna be great. But for today... ONWARD.

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Living the dream

I've been asked many times about being a military spouse and a stay at home dad. When asked whether or not I enjoy/like/love this life, my answer has been different over the years. Being a military spouse most certainly has its ups and downs. Life is pretty good when our spouses are home, not so much when they are deployed. And adding children to the mix only serves to complicate things even more.

As many of you know from reading my past few blog posts I wasn't thrilled about our change of direction back in January, going from a three year assignment to Kansas City to a two year shot in San Angelo certainly knocked the wind out of my sails. As you know, we had a 3 year plan to would take us right up to retirement and finally settling down. I'll admit I was really looking forward to finally moving beyond our military career. Now that my wife will be taking a command, though, things got a lot more complicated. As you may or may not know, a successful battalion command opens up more doors to promotion and future assignments. Thus, a 3 year plan went out the window.

As with any major change that comes our way, it takes some time to get used to it, to adjust to a new direction. Having had more than 2 months to come to terms with our new direction, I can confidently say I'm ready to go. But, confession time that this is, I have to admit that my earlier desire to bolt from the military was based more on my mindset during a deployment than a clear headed examination of the facts. No one can be blamed for wanting to pull the proverbial rip cord when times are tough; however, major life decisions shouldn't be made when times are tough. Now that my wife has been home for the last few months, I can see that we probably won't be ready to retire at 20 years. There's still a lot my wife wants to do with her career and as long as she's capable, it would be wrong of me to demand her to end it simply because I get tired of the challenges that come with it.

Is this "living the dream"? Perhaps. We travel, we live in lots of different places. We meet tons of different people. And, just maybe, we make a difference in many of the places we go. It's not always easy, as the MANY deployments of the last 3-4 years have shown. But we've proved that we can survive and thrive during them. I know that I've learned a great deal about resilience simply by watching how my kids deal with adversity. Funny thing: they look at each PCS move as a new adventure, ready to see what is waiting for them at our new destination. They don't look around themselves and mourn all that they are leaving. Watching them, I feel a bit ashamed of how I feel about not wanting to move. The Bible talks about how we should have the faith and the midset of a child. I always applied that to simply a "child-like" believe in God. But the truth is it can also be applied to many other aspects of our lives. Every new move is an opportunity to them, not a hassle.

So that's how I'm going to approach this from now on. Each new move, each new assignment as an adventure. So bring it on, I'm ready to go!


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It's all in the details!

As we get closer to the upcoming move, there are any number of items that have to be dealt with. Most of them include adding more stress to my life! Chief among them is the issue of where we are going to live. Aside from the worries of moving to a small town in Texas, not having a definite plan on where we're going to live is a huge concern. Let me explain.

With the exception of 9 months spent living with my folks during my wife's Afghanistan deployment, we've lived in on-post housing since 2005. There's a certain amount of safety and security that goes with living in what amounts to an enormous gated community. Add to that the convenience of having everything you need to close, and you can imagine our desire to continue. Now, I know that there are many of you, my loyal readers who haven't ever lived on post and don't relate, and many more still who have chosen to live off post to get away from the 24 hour military life. Completely understandable. Our experience has been great living on post, so we want to continue.

That said, we discovered yesterday that our plan to live on base (yep, base since it's Air Force) hit a major obstacle. All that is available for us is a 3 bedroom small house. Keep in mind that we are a family of 6! Yep, you guessed it, too small. Sure, it's convenient, on base, and in a great school district. But it turned out to be even smaller than we thought it would be. In fact, while we don't live in large quarters now, we would end up having to put a sizable amount of our furniture into storage just to squeeze into this house. So, it looks like this isn't an option.

Since we are only going to be there for my wife's command (2 years) and then another PCS move, buying a house isn't an option. What's left? Renting. However, for whatever reason, there really isn't much in the way of homes for rent where we're going. In fact, I think our choices at this time are between 2 houses. That's it. It's not because we're picky. It's because that's all we could find!

There might be some other homes that come open, but are they going to fit our family? Do they have a neighborhood full of children? Are they safe? As the title says, it's all in the details. There are so many factors that play into where we're going to live. Finally, we're getting to the point where time is starting to get short. We move in less than 2 months. That's not a ton of time to nail down a place to live, sign a lease, and have an address for the movers to take our stuff.

As many of you know, PCS moves are part of our lifestyle. Being an Army family, we are pretty much guaranteed to move every 2-3 years. And now that my wife is a LTC, those moves start happening a bit more often. That's true with just about any service. The higher you go in rank, the less amount of time you stay in one place.

If there's one thing that I'm not worried about, it's my kids. They've shown over and over again how adaptable they are when it comes to moving. They seem to make friends quickly and fit right in. Challenges like living in a new city just roll right off their backs. They really are an amazing example of how we should respond to these changes.

So here's to finally finding a place to live. After that, it's all just details...


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